WHY am I??

WHY am I still sacrificing for him even when I know he's not beside me no more?
WHY am I still crying & thinking about him day and night and not having my life straight but him having his day passed by day by day smoothly like nothing happened & having his happiest day of his life.
WHY am I rejecting all guys' calls, messages and outings except his when I know he's not doing the same.